This story begins as any normal shift does, popping bottles and mixing alcoholic beverages. It was a fairly busy night and made temperature conditions pretty warm. As a result I was drinking lots of water to stay hydrated.
At this one particular hour I had already consumed plenty of water and was in desperate need to visit the restroom. Around the same time a crowd a people came in and I was unable to do so. After about an hour I absolutely had to take five. I wasn’t ready for what I was about to see next.
The instant I walked into the restroom the attendant says to me, “Check that guy out in the stall, I think he’s masturbating.” I didn’t believe him at first, but after I handled my business I observed what he was referring to. This had to be the funniest sight ever, this guy is in the stall feet are rocking, head was bobbing up and down, and no sounds of water resonating. Needless to say I couldn’t believe this guy was in a public restroom doing this. So after while we had to get this guy out of there, security came and tried to get him out and he told them, “Hold on a second I got this (No joke).” So when that failed a member of management was summoned who had a key to the stall and was able to open the stall and force him out. By that time he had everything put away (thank goodness) and tried to deny what he was doing.
As with the previous story (Not a Crackhead, but Crackish) if you are in need to support a habit and it shouldn’t be done in public, try and wait till you get home because it’s embarrassing when you get caught. Stay tuned on Monday for a recipe called "Surfer on Acid."
These stories are real accounts, so if you plan to drink and have a good time do so responsibly. Remember to call a cab or a friend because the cost of a DWI is way more than a $20 cab ride home. Also, if you plan or happen to take someone home use protection. For two reasons, one there are many STD’s floating out there and it only takes one to ruin your life or that of others. The second reason is because a $3 condom is less expensive then 18 years of raising a child.